Struck me as I was making my sandwich this morning, on my standard wheat bread; why do we even MAKE white bread anymore?  

• It’s been shown to have little to no nutritional value
• I know it would lose a taste test to any half-decently made variety loaf
• Hot button, how fat do we want our nation’s youth to get?  Soppin’ up their spaghettios with a hunk of white bread isn’t getting the video game controller out of their hands any faster  

I hadn’t bought white bread in as long as I remember, but now I’m making a conscious effort to boycott it.  I hope you’ll do the same.  It’s in the best interest of our children, and they, along with Doctor’s leading the field in bionic enhancements, are our future.

For our catchphrase-based, minimal attention span readers, I’ll break it down to this slogan I just thought up, which I may go ahead and copyright if the cause gets some steam behind it—

White (bread), ain’t alright.  Aight?