The Ders Report
A “Sad Ending” Massage

Pretty sad day for old Anders Holmvik. I decided to get a massage (after a bunch of urging by Adam). I don’t normally like massages because I don’t like strangers touching my body in a semi - intimate way, but in the back of my mind I sort of figured that this might be an “intimate” massage (being that we’re at a sex resort and everything).

The massage started out innocently enough, but then the masseuse kept throwing out all these weird, confusing sexual signals (she even had sexy music playing) and I assumed she was waiting for me to make the first move…

Long story short, I made the first move and she made the last move. She screamed at me, slapped me and banned me from the massage area for the remainder of the trip. I’m pretty embarrassed, but I don’t think I’m entirely to blame for thinking that something sexy was supposed to happen. 

Still got a few hours to “win” the bet, so I better look for love somewhere away from the massage area (I actually have to, as I’ve been banned from there).